Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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