I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
