can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
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