You just made me feel so damn special
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
