Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
What changed your mind?
Being sober
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Randomize
