What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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