If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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