They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
