i was born a porn star she said
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Randomize
