I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
