I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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