this boner is exhausting
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
