he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
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