Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize