Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
My dick has a subreddit
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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