Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
