Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize