I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Randomize
