I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
