I need help removing her.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
