i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
You need Xanax blowdarts
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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