Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
