That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
