I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize