Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Randomize