Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize