Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Randomize
