so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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