I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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