question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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