dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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