I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
