A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I got inside last night via doggy door
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
