i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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