Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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