3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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