the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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