I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
