who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Ketchup is God's man juice
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
