Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
