her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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