shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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