well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
