You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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