They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
