its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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