Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
