I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
