Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
