His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
