I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
