just survived the first fart of the relationship.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
