if you like me you must not know who I am
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize